Memoir

She was 21 years old when she found out that she was pregnant again.  She noticed that she had been exhibiting signs of pregnancy, including nausea, cravings, and headaches.  She eventually became way too suspicious of being pregnant again and decided on taking a test although she was worried about how her mom would react or what in the world she would do.  At this point, Alondra was about to turn 6 years old, and Maria kind of felt like she was ready for another baby.  When her pregnancy test read positive, she jeered with excitement and then took another test that also read positive.  She realized how excited she was to have another baby, especially one that could accompany Alondra, who was lonely and had awful anxiety when she was left alone at the babysitters.  Maria imagined Alondra being a big sister and then couldn’t wait to bring another life into the world.

            Maria scheduled an appoint at the doctor’s office as soon as possible, and the day of her appointment the tests came back a little weird.  She remembers him writing down “possibly pregnant” on his clipboard, then handing her a referral to an OBGYN in Norfolk, Nebraska.  She made her way two days later, after calling in and setting another appointment.  She remembers the secretary on the phone congratulating her on her possibly pregnancy.  Hearing this made her realize how nervous she was, and how she wasn’t sure how to tell Wendy, her adopted mother since she was 16 years old.

            When she got to the OBGYN, they ran blood tests and urine tests, and then sat her in a room to impatiently await the news.  The nurse finally came in and congratulated Maria on being pregnant, and she smiled, knowing all along that she was.  They told her that she was two months along which caused Maria to immediately think back on all of the things she could have done in the past two months that could have harmed the baby.  She then quickly accepted that she had nothing to worry about.

            About a month later, she was already showing.  Her lower back was aching as if the pressure wouldn’t stop.  Then one day, her stomach was cramping badly and she quickly became alarmed, knowing that this wasn’t normal.  When she was pregnant with Alondra it was a much slower process… She just knew that these aches weren’t and couldn’t be right. So she went to her OBGYN immediately, and the nurse pulled her in for an ultrasound to check on the status of the baby.

            While lying on the hospital bed, her anxiety was in full force.  She was holding the paper sheets as tight as she could, alone in the bed wondering how she could possibly handle losing a baby. The nurse came in and began the ultra sound.  She massaged the cold gel onto Maria’s stomach, and looked up at the screen as if searching for something.  Maria looked over in time to see the nurse circle something on the screen.  Maria figured that she did this to identify the baby, because this early in a pregnancy it’s hard to tell what the baby really looks like.  She asked the nurse, “Oh, is that my baby?” While hearing a heartbeat come onto the ultra sound, her anxiety drifted away hearing this sound... And then the nurse replied, “Well, one of them!” Just then, Maria’s heart sank.  Alarmed she yelped, “What? One of them?!” to which the nurse responded “Oh! Found the other one!” And the nurse circled another baby on the screen, and then another little heartbeat filled the silence of the room.  Maria looked over and saw the labels “Baby 1” and “Baby 2” typed out on the screen.  All that Maria could feel was a flood of emotions but mostly dread.  She was in shock.  She had no idea how she could afford two more babies, at only 21.

            After the ultra sound was over, the nurse excitedly congratulated her on baring twins.  Maria left the OBGYN with a referral to a doctor capable of delivering twins.  At this point she was crying her eyes out, she was so worried about what in the world she was going to do.  She had no idea how she was going to parent two more babies; after all she had been a single parent for the past six years and still didn’t feel like she had the hang of it.  On her drive home, amidst her hysteria, she figured it was time to call her mom.  She was hysterical and dry-heaving, incapable of catching her breath.  The moment she called Wendy and she answered, Wendy was immediately concerned.  “Honey, what’s wrong? Are you okay? Is Alondra okay?” “Mom, where are you? I really need to tell you something.” “I’m on the way back to Schuyler, what is it? What’s going on Maria? Honey, you need to calm down.” “Mom, you need to pull over to the side of the road please I really need to tell you this.” “Uh okay, I’m pulling over right now. What is it?” “Are you pulled over?” “Yes.” “Mom, I’m pregnant.” “Oh my god! When did you find out?” “Well, I’ve known for a couple weeks… but mom, oh my god, mom it’s twins.” “WHAT!? OH MY GOD. Oh my god oh my god oh my god…” “Mom I don’t know what to do I’m so scared right now.” “Well, what’re we going to do?” “I don’t know mom, I can’t handle two babies.” “Well you have to keep them!” “Well duh mom! I’m freaking out, Alondra is already expensive, I’m so scared.”

            After that conversation, she drove home to Schuyler, Nebraska, so that her mom could comfort her.  The next day when Maria arrived to work, her boss asked her how her appointment at the OBGYN went since Maria had to call out the day before.  Maria immediately burst into tears and sobs, “I’m not eating for two anymore!” Her boss was instantly alarmed, “Oh my god! I’m so sorry Maria!” “No no! I’m eating for three!” And instant surprise came over her boss, who told her how lucky she was, and how great it was that she was having twins.  She found it so hard to believe at the time; Maria had no idea how lucky she was until she brought her son and daughter into the world 5 months later, and her small little family of two grew into a beautiful family of four.

Reference:

Peña, M. (2017, February 7). Phone interview.

Hein, W. (2017, February 8). Phone interview.